Matthew McConaughey – This Is Why You’re Not Happy | One Of The Most Eye Opening Speeches

Matthew McConaughey – This Is Why You’re Not Happy | One Of The Most Eye Opening Speeches

We’ve all got two wolves in us. A good one and a bad one. And they both want to eat. Best I can tell we just got to feed that good one a little more than the other one. Happiness is an emotional response to an outcome. If I win I will be happy, if I don’t I won’t. It’s an if-then, cause-and-effect, Quid pro quo standard that we cannot sustain. Because we immediately raise it every time we attain it. See happiness; happiness demands a certain outcome. It is result reliant. And i say if happiness is what you’re after then You’re gonna be let down frequently and you’re gonna be unhappy much of your time. Joy, though. Joy’s a different thing. It’s something else. Joy is not a choice. It’s not a response to some result. It’s a constant. Joy is the feeling that we have from doing what we are fashioned to do. No matter the outcome. Now personally as an actor. I started enjoying my work and literally being more happy when I stopped trying to make the daily labor. A means to a certain in. For example, I need this film to be a box-office success. You know, I need my performance to be acknowledged. I need the respect of my peers. All those are reasonable aspirations, but the truth is as soon as the work; The daily making of the movie the doing of the deed became the reward in itself for me. I got more box-office more accolades and respect than I ever had before. See joy is always in process. It’s under construction. It is in constant approach. Alive and well in the doing of what we’re fashion to do. And enjoying. The easiest way to dissect success; it’s through gratitude. You mean thanks for that which we do have, for what is working. Appreciating the simple things we sometimes take for granted. We give thanks for these things . And that gratitude reciprocate. Creating more to be thankful for. It’s really simple and it works. I’m not saying being denial of your failures. No, we can learn from them, too. But only if we look at them constructively. As a means to reveal; what we are good at, what we can get better at what we do succeed at. My life’s a verb. We try our best. We don’t always do our best. And since we are the architects of our own lives. Let’s study the habits the practices the routines that we have that lead to and feed our success. Our joy, our honest pain our laughter our earned tears. Let’s dissect that and give thanks for those things. And when we do that guess what happens. We get better at them. And we have more to dissect. It’s a get-rich-quick on the Internet riches 15 minutes of fame world that we live in and we see it every day. But we all want to succeed, right? So the question that we’ve got to ask ourselves is what success is to us. What success is to you. Is it more money? That’s fine. I got nothing against money. Maybe it’s a healthy family. Maybe it’s a happy marriage. Maybe it’s to help others, to be famous, to be spiritually sound. To leave the world a little bit better place than you found it. Continue to ask yourself that question. Now your answer may change over time and that’s fine. But do yourself this favor. Whatever your answer is; don’t choose anything that will jeopardize your soul. Prioritize who you are who you want to be and don’t spend time with anything that antagonizes your character. Don’t drink the kool-aid man. It tastes sweet, but you will get cavities tomorrow. All right life is not a popularity contest. Be brave. Take the hill, but first answer that question. What’s my hill? Well for me it’s a measurement of five things. We got fatherhood. We got being a good husband. We got my health mind, body and spirit. We got career and we got friendships. These are what’s important to me in my life right now. Because I want to keep all five in healthy shape. And I know that if I don’t take care of them if I don’t keep up maintenance on them. One of them is gonna get weak man. It’s gonna dip too deep into the debit section. It’s gonna go bankrupt. It’s gonna get sick. Die. So first we have to define success for ourselves. And then we have to put in the work to maintain it. Take that daily tally. Tend our gurdan. Keep the things that are important to us in good shape. Defining ourselves by what we are not is the first step that leads us to really knowing who we are. You know that group of friends that you hang out with that really might not bring out the best in you. You know, they gossip too much or they’re kind of shady. They really aren’t gonna be there for you in a pinch. Or how about that bar? That we keep going to. That we always seem to have the worst hangover from. Or that computer screen. Right? The computer screen that keeps giving us an excuse not to get out of the house and engage with the world and get some real human interaction. I bet that food that we keep eating and stuff to taste so good going down; makes us feel like crap the next week. We feel lethargic and we keep putting on weight. Well, those people those places those things. Stop giving them your time and energy. Just don’t go there. I mean put them down. And when you do this when you do put them down, when you quit go in there. And you couldn’t given them your time. You inadvertently find yourself spending more time and in more places; that are healthy for you. That bring you more joy. Why? Because you just eliminated the who’s, the where, the what’s in the winds that were keeping you from your identity. Look trust me too many options. I promise you this too many options will make a tyrant of us all. Alright so get rid of the excess, the wasted time. Decrease your options. If you do this you will have accidentally; almost innocently put it in front of you what is important to you. My process of elimination. Knowing who we are is hard. It’s hard. So give yourself a break Eliminate who you are not first and you’re gonna find yourself where you need to be. Make voluntary obligations, I’m talking about the ones that we make with ourselves. With our God. With our own consciousness. I’m talking about the you versus you obligations. We have to have them. Now again, these are not societal laws. Expectations that we acknowledge and endow for anyone other than ourselves. These are faith-based obligations that we make on our own. These are not the lowered insurance rates for a good driving record. You will not be fined to put in jail. If you do not gratify these obligations i speak of; no one else covers these but you. They are your secrets with yourself, your own private counsel. Personal protocols. And while nobody throws you a party when you abide by them, no one’s going to arrest you when you break them either. Except yourself. An honest man’s pillow is his peace of mind. And when you lay down on that pillow at night no matter who’s in your bed. We all sleep alone. These are your personal jiminy crickets and there are not enough cops in the entire world to police them. It’s on you. It’s all on you. We do our best when our destinations are beyond the measurement. When our reach continually exceeds our grasp and when we have immortal finish lines. And when we do this; the race is never over the journey has no port. The adventure never ends, because we are always on the way. So do this. Do this and let them; let somebody else come up and tap you on the shoulder and say “Hey, you scored.” Let them run up and tap you on the shoulder and say “Man, you won!” Let them come tell you you can go home now. Let them say “I love you, too.” Let them say “Thank you.” Take the lid off the man-made routes that we put above ourselves and always play like an underdog.

Daniel Yohans

100 thoughts on “Matthew McConaughey – This Is Why You’re Not Happy | One Of The Most Eye Opening Speeches

  1. Absolute Motivation says:

    Always play like an underdog.

  2. Thomas Word says:

    God is the architect of my life, I just need to do His will by following His directions

  3. Louise Carroll says:


  4. Miranda Horner says:


  5. synchromorph says:

    I left a few comments about what happened to McConaughey and basically why being surrounded by assholes can interfere with a person's happiness.

    "Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self esteem, first make sure you are not, in fact, just surrounded by assholes." – William Gibson

  6. Deirdre Caskenette says:


  7. Jerarudooo says:

    please have my babies

  8. Tokyo Forex Trader says:

    "This is why you are not happy….you are not a rich, good looking movie star like me."

  9. Rosemary Garcia says:

    I would never ever date any actor that's why because their actors you never can tell with those in the entertainment industry

  10. Wandering Free says:

    I love this guy!

  11. Act on Wisdom says:

    New TEDx video on "The Art of Creative Inspiration":

  12. Tatjana Bicanin says:

    To be happy is a great decision 🙂

  13. Kim Dority says:

    Wow! That was a awesome speech!

  14. Ech p says:

    Bitch I’m not happy because I’m trying to pay off my student loans while trying to find a stable job and move out from my parents house and become independent but god forbid in this economy rich people love talking about happiness huh

  15. David says:

    It’s on you, it’s on you!!

  16. Leif Johnson says:

    McConaughey is the reason that I root against University of Texas football.

  17. Sen says:

    Happiness is not a state of existence. It is a reward. A feeling. It is momentary.

    Contentment, is a state of existence. It can be maintained, and lived in, long term. It is not as high as 'happiness', but that is why it can be maintained.

    Joy is somewhere in the middle of those two pillars. It cannot be lived in, long term, without interruption or break. But it can be found and experienced for a while. It's not a 'reward', so it's not intensely high, and it's not rapidly fading.

    If you want to find a 2 way path between Joy and contentment? It does not start with asking 'what can I get?'. It starts with asking 'how can I help others find joy and contentment?'.

    Because you can't travel that path long term, without helping others travel it.

    Be kind. Embrace empathy and compassion for others.

    But also set and maintain boundaries for your own health.

    This man's speech is decent, until he assumes that there is only one path to travel, to reach those things, for everyone.

    Face to face interactions are not the only form of healthy, social interactions. Especially for neurodiverse individuals. Don't degrade different forms of social interaction simply because you don't struggle with a specific type.

  18. Hand in Hand Together says:

    Live the journey don't be distracted by the destination- Loved this video, very powerful.

  19. Lorryn SilverSpike says:

    🤯 TRUE

  20. Music Ting says:

    What if you already have neglected and lost?

  21. Redline says:

    Just learn to be happy with what we are and what we have. We most probably have everything already to be happy. We just dont realize it.

  22. Peace Please says:

    “Happiness is an inside job”

  23. Ernest Trejo says:

    Cause I’m not a rich af white actor in the US.
    You’re right

  24. Tracey McNeel says:

    General Society is a PECKING ORDER; everyone tries to ONE UP each other or try to prove that they are better than…they all suck in my opinion. Even high placed Society, the infamous of it all of LIFE are the same as Society, but it is just more enhanced before the public eye; the MEDIA, yet they are the biggest, and fakest Drama queens and kings that set the worst examples for all to witness. They troll my soul? They are fooling themselves The wicked as generation of Vipers end up growing not only in their sins, but continue to TROLL their own souls repeatedly.

  25. AA Productions says:

    I thought that the word "happiness" is about acceptance and appreciation of your journey. Contentment is happiness.

    But the word "joy" is a more intense feeling. Joy cannot be an outlook/mindset as it is definitely an emotion. Happiness, on the other hand, can totally be an outlook, which is what we mean when we say "be happy, instead of trying to feel happy". Happy doesn't have to be an emotion.

  26. Agua Maple says:

    Bro you aint happy. You are the cause of 911 terrorist attacks. BURN HOLLYWOOD TO THE SHIT

  27. Matthew Colquhoun says:

    I always knew Matthew McConaughey was the reason I wasn't happy.

  28. Erin apple says:

    I used to have Natural Joy, I felt joyful for no other reason other than just being filled with Joy,
    I should have gotten away from people while I had the chance.
    I miss my happiness over nothing now I have to find happiness over something.

  29. kshamwhizzle says:

    I'd probably be a lot happier if I had as much money as Matthew tbh

  30. Try Until You Die says:

    Why Does Matthew McConauhey remind me of Jim Rohn.

    Anyone else see this?

  31. Simon Classe says:

    I didn't feed my bad wolf tonight tho he was very hungry

  32. Mary Smith says:

    really ?? you sold your soul to Lincoln

  33. Mary Smith says:

    oh for gods sakes shut up

  34. eddy bruh says:

  35. Larry Carter says:

    Money Buys Happiness

  36. Angel rose says:

    Yeah I really need a millionaire actor telling me about my happiness

  37. Matt Weynberg says:

    Great speech but I feel personally attacked, waiting for my Uber eats and he tells me not to eat that food :((((

  38. mysteryj says:

    "It's on you, it's on you. We do our best when our destination are beyond the measurement, when our reach continually exceeds our grasp, and when we have immortal finish lines. And when we do this the race is never over, the journey has no port, the adventure never ends, because we're always on the way"

  39. bouyant says:


  40. Hector Lugo says:


  41. Kelly tokarczyk says:

    Heya gay.

  42. Awaken VIBING says:

    Sooo you recommend quitting my draining job!!!!

  43. WhiteEagle PL says:

    What a piece of dumb crap

  44. Time To Change says:

    I showed this to my Goldfish now it's a Megalodon Shark

  45. jbela says:

    "Eliminate who you are not first and you're going to find yourself where you need to be" I'm already a better person , great quote

  46. Alex Forrest says:

    Well put together. Great speech, wise words

  47. Mohite komal says:


  48. Matt says:

    You have to be “content” with life.

  49. Kim Campbell says:

    Thank you so much

  50. Ionian Breeze says:

    Simple truth

  51. W S says:

    I forgot how it feels to be happy

  52. Gypsy Yarbrough says:

    Look pal. Fugazis still suck,really bad, real or not, for the person going through the shit because there is ALWAYS a real,actual victim. Thank you.

  53. Gypsy Yarbrough says:

    P.S. I'm still way down here at the bottom of the goddamn basin. The Permian Basin. Big Spring, Texas. United States of America.

  54. TRAZIM POSAO says:

    "Absolute Motivation" makes great content for motivation like me.
    I have YouTube Channel
    ( 4 Successful People ) where I teach people how to increase motiovation.
    If that could help you out, then check out some of my videos.
    Be sure to comment so that I can return the love.

  55. Bossman & Fitness says:

    My dog became a BEAST after watching this…..😜 and its making me become a King

  56. Gregory Alan Elliott says:

    Well, all right.

  57. Bethany Woods says:

    This is a beautiful video and just what i needed…. xx

  58. thefeelcompany says:

    Decrease your options!!! BOOOOOOM!!!

  59. Charles Pukeowski says:

    And that coming from Rust Cohle…..

  60. Mahajeet Singh says:

    Alright alright alright

  61. Connor Miller says:

    Need him on the Joe Rogan podcast bad

  62. Megan Cox says:

    2.4k people didn’t like this? WTF!!! 🥺😱🤯

    Thank you Mathew McConauhey 💖🙏🙏🙏

  63. Be Free TV says:

    all you american suckers…want to be ,,happyy,,..I SAY FUK HAPPY…Be Fee! VICTORY….fuk ,,love,, 2 ~! LMAO

  64. Isabel Garcia says:

    To leave the world better than how you found out…

  65. karl sunami says:

    I have the deepest gratitude towards god if he is in the physical form or not to have a life like mine !! Thank you for everything

  66. Asad Elahi says:

    Pain is just an excuse.

  67. Natalie s says:

    Life is not a popularity contest. So true!!! I think I spent most my life acting like it was. Caring way too much about what everyone thinks.

  68. Parker's Properties says:

    Showed this to my cat, now he's an independent responsible member of society.

  69. Jess Schoen says:

    I have no idea what I want to do for living

  70. Michelle Landreth says:

    Ive left corporate america so i can love others to the degree i want, express myself and feel whole. Ive never been more grounded and whole. And poor! 😀

  71. DDS Software says:

    You don't even have to watch the fucking video you can just read all the quotes of from this bunch of sad cunts below:

  72. Tim Noneyabusiness says:

    I thought this was another Lincoln commercial

  73. taraniso says:

    I wish these words were coming out of someone else's mouth. McConaughey always comes off like an entitled douchenozzle who skated by on his looks his entire life.

  74. Nobody Unknown says:

    Matthew give me 1 million dollars instead of a cheesy speech filled with platitudes.

  75. Waves Of Time says:

    Love it so much 🙂
    What is success to you? whatever your answer is, don't choose anything that will jeopardize your soul !!!
    eliminate who you are not first, and your gonna find yourself where you are meant to be!
    thanks for the great vid

  76. Molly Loucks says:

    I wish Matthew would run for president

  77. isanybodyhome says:

    Idk, I dont feel anything from this, i feel numb

  78. donici bianca says:

    love u

  79. donici bianca says:

    One person i will love to meet and die by

  80. bad hombre says:

    He was an underdog in Uvalde

  81. Charleen Lee says:

    Me, myself, and I… Yeah yeah yeah. Where is God in all of this? ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME! "WITH OUR OWN GOD"? There is only ONE GOD. DENY SELF AND STOP BEING SO SELFISH ABOUT YOU! I love Matthew but he is a rich guy. He isn't hurting. He hasn't lost much. He has no clue about real pain. Not really. His struggle is not what normal people have. God says, deny yourself and "die" to follow me. Die to SELF. I'm a realist and this talk really just isn't what I need to hear. All that matters is my relationship with God. Being the person HE wants me to be. Not what "I" want. I know that people that really don't understand selflessness, will not understand this comment.

  82. Jodie Wilson says:

    Never choose anything that will jeopardize your soul…i feel that so much! I start my day with this speech daily!

  83. Sam Brandner says:

    In late 2018, early 2019 I fought through some of the worst depression I’ve ever experienced. I got put on medication but struggled with suicidal thoughts… I used to sleep to escape the life I hated. And when the medication took away my ability to sleep I had to use sleeping pills.

    Slowly life turned around but I still needed sleeping pills to get rest. When I realized that I was spending my time so uselessly, I started picking things I had always wanted to do but never felt like I had the energy to do. Turns out the energy was there, that leftover energy was why I still couldn’t sleep at night. I wasn’t doing everything I needed to in order to feel satisfied.

    If something’s keeping you up or if you look forward to sleep it’s because you haven’t found what it is that calls you. What is it that gets you excited to live. Don’t feel bad if you don’t know what it is! Just start experimenting! Volunteer, exercise, join a club! I promise depression, worry, anxiety and doubt is only there because you don’t know what you need in order to feel fulfilled. You’ll never find that answer without searching. And searching is going to make you tired, but you’ll rest easy knowing you’re chasing it!

  84. Sam Curren says:

    One day I will have a million people watching my videos. I'm sure of it

  85. Renee Slarve says:

    Happiness is nothing more than having something to look forward to tomorrow.

  86. Lukerative Lion says:

    I needed this, thank you

  87. CDM192 says:

    I hate this speech, because it's coming from someone who is self-aggrandizing himself while castigating others. He just bloviates with such incessant arrogance with that gnawing twain. Figure out "who we are not"? Well, I'm not an elephant, I'm not a fish and many other things. Gee, what great advice!! Puke.

    If we're unhappy at all it's because you made it rich and I didn't.

  88. Mr Yohan says:

    One day, I will get 1 Million views on my videos. I believe in it.

  89. Sallie Girl says:

    And this is why my peace is within me .I have no problem with my pillow💗

  90. Natasha S says:


  91. DivaGirl10 says:

    Hot AND smart and motivational? Wow

  92. John Bryce says:

    Does matty not know that god does not exist

  93. STRAWMAN says:

    if you can scale down what he is saying to the average persons life this hit makes a whole lot of sense. if you can, you wont ever see pass his privileged and status. i listened to this speech knowing this guy has a boat, several cars a few properties and access to an overall higher echelon of life.. But relatively speaking he is human, a man, has a job, has family and friends relationships that need effort and genuine humanity to maintain just like the rest of us.. respect to you Mr Mcconaughey for taking the time to be real. love you bro.

  94. Elise Swanson says:

    Merry Christmas

  95. Grant Bishop says:

    Love this video! This is great motivation! I just started making my own videos to help inspire others. See whats new for 2020!! Please visit and subscribe

  96. olll Blac says:

    No one will believe in you more than you believe in yourself, so take risks, be thankful, and when you get to where you want in life help somone else up 🙏

  97. Tous says:

    Happiness is a distraction.

  98. Tom Meier says:

    we have , we must we … we , i , i have to now

  99. Bohemia Lite says:

    Why is everyone so full of philosophical all of a sudden.

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