Greetings. I had a bit of help with this one,
so my thanks to Professor Gary Francione for his contribution to the lyrics; also to the
late, great Johnny Cash for the tune, which I’m sure many of you will recognise as “Folsom
Prison Blues” [Guitar] We’re told welfare campaigning
Will someday put things right. That’s because the world
Won’t go vegan overnight, But welfare just ain’t working;
I hang my head and cry. It don’t stop animals suffering.
Here’s some reasons why… Campaign against the fur trade:
Supplying it’s a blight; Protest outside department stores,
Give celebrities a fright, But never dare to mention
Leather, silk and wool When there ain’t no moral difference;
They’re every bit as cruel. Get eggs from free-range chickens.
Tuck into ’em with glee. The welfarists would have us think
The birds are roaming free But reality is different:
They’re all in one big jail Instead of lots of small ones–
Another welfare fail. Buy dolphin-friendly tuna.
It makes a tasty dish. Care about the dolphins
But don’t bother ’bout the fish Cos tuna don’t have feelings
And they ain’t as cute So it’s fine to just kill ’em;
You needn’t give a hoot. Put sprinklers in the hen house,
So the birds don’t die of smoke, Gotta save them for the slaughterhouse;
It seems a sick, sick joke. But sprinklers are “more ethical”
By the wefarists we’re told. But I gotta tell you,
This welfare crap is gettin’ old. Vegan education
Must be the thing to do. Animals ain’t property;
They’re moral persons too. We can’t rely on miracles
To change the paradigm: 200 years of welfare
Ain’t been worth a dime.